One of the many things I learned from Tony Robbins is about fear, and how it's always going to be there.
Fear will always be a part of my life, and fear is a normal part of everyone’s life.
Fear will never leave us, because fear is needed to keep us alive.
Fear is a natural survival instinct.
Fear boils down into two things which are the same for every human being no matter who you are or where you are.
Fear of not being enough
e.g. I’m not wealthy enough, I’m not strong enough, I’m not tall enough, I’m not smart enough, I’m not sexy enough, I’m not funny enough.... and so the list goes on.
Fear of not being loved
The question we need to be asking ourselves is how can we learn to use this fear?
There’s ENERGY in fear and this energy can be used in either a positive or negative way.
Negative Way
When you‘re constantly revisiting fear and fighting it you expend energy and it can be draining.
It can depress you, it can numb you; it can stop you from doing anything.
Ultimately the fear could be stopping you from following your dreams and living the life you’ve always wanted.
Positive Way
Now we know and understand fear’s not going to go away, we need to change our feeling about it.
So instead of resisting fear, we need to learn how to go with the fear, and to use the feeling in a positive way.
We need to understand what our fears are and how to face fear with courage. As Tony puts it, it’s essentially learning how to “dance with fear”.
How?
Take the time to think about what you fear most? Why is that? What are the reasons behind your fear? Where does it come from?
Think about all the benefits that having this fear has given you – has it made you more ambitions? More driven? More active? More confidence? More interesting? There will always be a benefit – find it.
Why to do you need to take control of the fear now? What has it done to your life? What has it stopped you from doing? E.g. If you fear flying has it stopped you from travelling abroad? Going on holidays overseas with your family?
Once you understand your fears, you can face them and overcome them.
Have courage and do the opposite of fear. E.g. If you fear public speaking, then go and speak in public! If you fear swimming go and have swimming lessons.
Practice makes perfect. The more you practice overcoming your fears the sooner you will.
The more you face your fears, the sooner you will take back control of your life.
Take action as soon as possible. E.g. if you fall of a horse, get back on it as soon as possible.
Don’t let the fear control you.
Enjoy the “dance” and use the positive energy it provides you to propel you forward.